It Starts with You by Kathy Cobb

22 Oct It Starts with You by Kathy Cobb

There is an old British comedy show called “Keeping Up Appearances” in which the main character, Hyacinth, is always striving to gain the admiration of others. She spends so much of her energy struggling to be seen as that special somebody that she never allows herself the opportunity to discover who or what she can really become. The show has a way of making her life comical, but the truth behind the story is this constant effort always leaves Hyacinth feeling unappreciated by family and friends and a sense of never arriving or making it!

Are you like Hyacinth and trying too hard to impress others? Do you really like your friends? Do you enjoy being with them? Is your life filled with friends that you can relax with? Do you have friends with whom you can be real with? Or do you find yourself “Keeping up Appearances” by being someone you think others want you to be? Or better yet, are you just going with the flow?

Love the One You’re With

There is an old song lyric, “love the one you’re with”, and yet we all struggle with loving ourselves. Could how we see ourselves be a root problem in building friendships? I believe so! Building healthy friendships starts first with you being your own best friend and then taking the time to understand what really matters to you in a friendship.

At this point, I recommend you think about the statement above because you are with yourself 24/7, and depending on how you see yourself determines who you will choose as your friends. For me, I have learned two important keys that enabled me to enjoy healthy friendships.

Key #1- Loving the Lord with all my heart was the first step. Developing a personal relationship with God opened my heart to see my value and worth as a woman. Another important factor I learned was what I am willing to accept or not in my relationships. With this new outlook, I began to understand what I had to offer in a friendship and what truly mattered to me was important.

Key #2 – Love your neighbor as yourself. Once I realized who I was and what was important to me, I began to make wise choices in choosing friends that I can be myself with. It also opened up my heart to see people differently.

I learned two important lessons:

• Giving yourself permission to embrace and love the real you will ultimately take care of “Keeping Up Appearances”.
• Loving your neighbor becomes easier when you develop a whole new outlook concerning those around you because God has shown you the importance of valuing and respecting others.

New Outlook

I have always struggled with the word “soul searching” because I have a tendency to focus on the negative in myself. One day, I finally realized that I needed to take a chance on me and get to know the real me. Was it easy? Not at first, but little by little as I asked myself questions and I began to discover the friend within – to my surprise I liked hanging out with her!

To begin your own adventure, start writing down the things you would like to do or accomplish in your life. This list may take a while, but you will soon discover important things about yourself. The list will open your mind to new possibilities. The next thing you know, you will become more adventurous, and develop new friendships that are healthy and complement your life. You will also find you develop friendships with others that, at one time, you would have shied away from.

With a new outlook in life, you will find that keeping up appearances is a thing of the past. Take a chance on yourself, become your own best friend, and watch the doors open to New Adventures in Life and Friendship! Your new beginning STARTS TODAY!

Kathy Cobb is the founder of GWG – Gabbin’ With The Girls ™, a global friendship and events organization. Kathy is passionate about connecting women through the gift of friendship. As an inspirational coach and motivational speaker Kathy inspires and empowers women to embrace life to the fullest! For more information contact Kathy at Kathy@gabbingirls.com   To learn more go about GWG- Gabbin’ The Girls ™ and events go to www.gabbingirls.com.